Sunday, February 24, 2008
Definitely a deeper topic than Penelope
The minister at church, Paster Z (PZ), has been using John 3:16 for the basis of his last several sermons. I have enjoyed hearing him break down such a simple verse that I am very comfortable with, memorization and all, to have such a deeper meaning. However, I have personally been going through an inner dialog during each service that really bothers me because of how upset I get....that I'm not ready to have eternal life. I don't want to leave my earthly life because of my immediate family. He lead one entire sermon on death and having eternal life and that strong Christians are ok to die because the gift of eternal life is calming to them. Every example that he gave was of an older person who had lived their life fully. I haven't. I have to see Ty hit his first tee-ball and run to third base first. I have to see Katie in her first dance recital wearing some silly bumble bee tutu outfit. Braces, proms, graduations, weddings, etc. I know eternal life is there for me but is it wrong to not want it...yet? I never had issues with death until I brought Ty home from the hospital and had something/someone else to live for that really needed me. I couldn't watch the nightly news because I would hear about traffic accidents and that would scare me enough that I had to muster the guts to drive to his early pediatrician visits. Surging hormones didn't help either.
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6 comments:
I think that there are many people out there who have the same feelings as you do. I wonder too what my girls would do if I wasn't there for them. Is it selfish to want to stay on earth instead of going to heaven? A little bit. But you have to think that God understands those feelings. We don't get to choose when it is our time to go, but I can only hope that I will be at peace with my life when it happens. Sometimes, I feel like I should write letters to the girls that they can have on "important" days such as birthday and weddings and such, in case something does happen to me. But then I never get around to writing them. Love your children as if today was the last day, love your God unconditionally, and everything will be ok.
I agree with Andee. It is certainly a feeling we all have. I myself do not want to die b/c there's many things I want to do. I'd like to see Braeden grow, grow old with Elizabeth, eventually see friends on a regular basis (will this ever happen?) and so on. However, I do have a peace that if I do die, I am ready. I know where I'm going to spend my eternal life and the joy I will experience there. If God wants to take me today on my way home, I'm ready and at peace with it.
Check out Luke 12: 22-34 and Matthew 6:25-34
THEREFORE DO NOT WORRY ABOUT TOMORROW, FOR TOMORROW WILL WORRY ABOUT ITSELF. EACH DAY HAS ENOUGH TROUBLE OF ITS OWN.
Oh, I'm right there with you! I know when my time comes I'll be going to heaven - but I pray constantly to see Sarah Bradley turn 50 (making me 75 - nice and old). But, no matter when my 'time' is, I know she'll be taken care of. I just pray I can be the one doing the caring until she's a grandmother herself!
Madhatter's verse is my life verse - I live by it daily.
Sounds like a great sermon series. This is something that I've thought about pre-Mattie. And it can be scary and make you feel a bit selfish. But I agree with Andee, too, in that God does understand those feelings. Even Christ agonized over his own death. "Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done." (Luke 22:42) But he trusted his father (thank God!) and was at peace.
im with you. i dont want to leave polly either. i think it's natural as a parent (especially with hormones) that you feel this way. i don't think God will hold it against us. i know that my grandfather (85 at the time and post heart attack #1) was eating snickers he hid in his car and my mom fussed at him for it. he told her - "if i die b/c of a snickers or b/c i am working in my garden - know that i died happy." my mom cried for 2 days. i think that it takes a certain amount of living to get to that point. maybe 85 is it. i know my mom wasn't ready to be without her dad - but he felt like she was in good enough hands to leave. i think when the time IS right - you will be at peace with it. we just had a friend (40yrs old) who lost his wife (39 and a mother of 2). it has been hard to imagine how he must feel and how he even gets out of bed - but i'll tell you - that funeral was the most uplifting thing i've ever attened and the family is doing remarkablly better than i would think i could do in the same situation - but again - i think you have peace with death - when it's time.
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